J is for Jellyfish

Hi guys. This is the post where I talk about my biggest fear. 

Jellyfish. 

The evil mucus of the sea. 

The droppings of alien life forms. 

Satan's man seed (was that too far?). 

There is legitimately nothing that scares me more than jellyfish. 
You know something is evil when you get stung my a translucent tentacle and then someone has to pee on you to get the sting out. 


Here's a little, all too true, story for you:

I have terrible eye sight. I'm usually wearing contacts, but on occasion I rock my glasses. Especially at the beach. So it was a hot summer day here in Eastern NC. Me and my (at the time) bff Elizabeth went to the beach for the day. We swam out pretty far because we don't like to get pummeled by waves. We're also good swimmers and don't mind floating in the ocean where we can't touch. Clearly, I left my glasses on the shore with our stuff. 

So I was floating in place chatting with Elizabeth when out of the corner of my left eye I saw a jelly fish swimming next to me. 

It's a miracle I didn't have a heart attack right then and there. 

So I did what any rational person does. I screamed like I was being murdered and swam like it was my job back to shore. Elizabeth didn't know what was going on, she just screamed and swam with me (sharks are her biggest fear and not out of the realm of possibility where we were swimming). In the process of us hauling ass to the shore the rational part of my brain (it's buried deep deep in there) realized the jelly fish was with me still. 

You ready?

It was my hand. My left hand floating next to me. Attached to my body. I thought it was a jelly fish. So I stopped and laughed, Elizabeth mocked me. We were about half way back to shore, so we decided to go ahead and get out. 

We then ran through a jelly fish. It stung Elizabeth pretty good and just barely grazed my thigh.